Question For The Week..

Have you you ever been unhappy about something in your life or about your life in general, and you want to change it, but you can't change it because someone else has to make a dicision to bring about the change..and then the more you think about it the more you get upset about it and then you want to walk away because you feel the decsion will never be made and walking away will solve the problem, but then there isnot really a reason to walk way, but then it is because the issue makes you unhappy and the decision maker thinks your fine but deep down inside your not..

Does anyone understand this? I am just venting without details.

Quote For Today

"The divine is not something high above us. It is in heaven, it is in earth, it is inside us..." -- Morihei Ueshiba

I don't Know About YOu Guys....

...But I just been sooooo busy.. I am still here... lurking around, but I am just busy... Thank you for your concerned emails and concerns...shows I am missed .. Thanks & God Bless.

DREAMS.

Some don't know what it is to dream....
dreams come true when you have faith and believe.

Never let the left hand know what the right hand is doing
Because when you do, the left will try to shoot you down!
And life keeps moving for them,
While you ride the wave that God has provided for you.

Some don't know what it is to dream
until they see you living what you've dreamt.

There is a day coming my friend when you will open your eyes
and see, just how real my dreams were!
And at that point I wonder will you wish you had believed
or will you start bringing to life-your dreams!

This is for my homie..

There is only so much she can take before she turns away, but it doesn't matter because he doesn't care anyway. You guys have been friends for such a long time, but now your friendship seems like it's going to die.

Girl, you've spent so much time changing you to fix him, only to realize in the end he cared only about him. He cared when you were sick, but wouldn't change in his paper work to include you on his medical bills. Yet, he sat to figure out how he could include someone elses...I remember the trembling in your voice when you told me how you felt.

You guys been through your ups and downs.. nothng major it seems.. and how can he tell you to change, if he has to change a billion things, but I don't ever see you complaining.

I am sorry that you are feeling like this..He has no idea what burdens are on your chest, but yet you continue to smile, even when your feeling are hurt. I was there when you silently cried and told me how you felt, But there is only so much you can take, when he wants an eye for an eye for everything! You can't ask for something for you unless he is getting something to; How unwanted you said that made you feel...Girl believe me... I know the deal.

I remember you said yall had a little money and how it was funny that somehow it disappeared, so I guess you have to do what's best and start preparing for your future because as it stands he doesn't believe in you and he doesn't want to be a committed man, which you have to understand, so it is your choice to open your fingers and let go of his hand because it is obvious that he doesn't want to hold on... Talk to you soon.

Nitty What Have You been Up to?

Well Happy Black History Year, and Happy Valentines Day...I know I have been missing for a good while, but you how it is. I have been okay but just busy...so being I don't encounter too many things to write about I will just let you in what I have been up too...So let's begin with the fact that I have No Time.

NO TIME:

Well besides the fact that I get up at 6 am, take the kids to school, get to work by 9am to leave work at 1:30 and travel to arrive at another job and stay there from 2-7pm explains why I have not time.

OFF MY CHEST!

• Don't think I forgot about what you did. I know you think it was dont in the closet, but remember that what you do in the darkness always come to light, so since I am connected to the light I am tuned into your game, so don't sleep on me!
• Sometimes I just need to peace and quiet, so just lower your voice sometimes...it can become frustrating and annoying.
• What the hell is your problem..I just started at this new job and your already trying to throw a monkey wrench in my game, don't play me..that is why I guess you quit.
• I am sick and tired of your lying ass... now I see why you are always trying to blame someone else because you just don't know what you are doing. Retire already!!
• Please signal people...signal...I am a new driver I cannot read your thoughts..I guess that is why I am developing road rage.
• I wonder how you really feel about me..I have not seen you in a while, but I guess it's when you need something is when you want to deal with me...I wonder if you would still introduce me as your best friend.
• You don't know everything!!!
• Stop preaching to me if your not doing right!
• I am telling you ...I am going to quit on you guys...I am almost there.
• Learn to compromise...that is what life is..he created women to handle certain things and men to handle certain things...when that understanding is developed things will be okay.
• Don't think I don't know..I know everything.
• Just when you thought they learned they got Geico and had no damn car!!!!!!!
• Jesus, I want to thank you for looking out for me...know that during my struggles you have put the right people in my way. Thank you for blessing me.
• I love you but...
  

STRUGGLING WITH SEXUALITY:

I know when yall saw this you thought it was me..No... I am strictly dickly...and hold nothing against those who like or love same sex, but what would you do if you found out what you thought all along about someone... To be more specific...I feel that somoeone I know is having a secret relationship with a woman and a guy in my church is struggling with his sexuality, but he wants to be a minister,but the Pastor doesn't believe that he should be preaching, so the struggle that I am having the contradiction that God can use anyone, but you shouldn't be with the same sex. The fact is the congregation doesn't know he is gay or bi, but some people do or think he is, but I feel that doesn't change anything becuase I believe that God can use anyone and noone should be picked to deliver a word to Gods people unles Gods picks them.

If someone in your church was hinding their sexuality and you found out for a fact that he/she was seeing the same sex, would you want them preaching to you?

THE DAY THAT TOOK TO LONG TO END!

1. It was oneday this week,,I can't remember because I don't have time to think, but that morning we were running late and my oldest son said that he would take the train, so I agreed and decided to drive my youngest son to school.
2. First, since my husband was going to be late he drove hisself to work and we switched when he got to his destination, I took over the wheel and put my foot to the pedal to try and get my youngest son to school on time; he was 5 mins late.
3. After getting my husband uptown and across town from where we live then driving into Manhattan to get my son to school, i usually drive back uptown to park my car near the new place that I work at and jump on the train to midtown, so
4. I drive back uptown, park my car...it's raining...I go into my pocket to get out my metro card for the train ( hair & nails done while rain messing up my hair) to prepare myself to walk 3 blocks to the train, when I realize that my wallet is not in my pocket, so I walk 1-1/2 blocks back to my car to look for my wallet, but it wasn't there, then I pictured it on my bed where I left it, so I was furious because remember I just drove from the 170's to the 90's back up to the 100's within Manhattan and now I have no wallet which mean no driver's license, so I did not want to risk getting pulled over, so I called my husband to vent! then I called my day job, to tell them that I would not be in the office today, but I will be working from home,so
5. I drove back to the bronx, only to find that it was 10:30am, so that means that I been on the road since 7:30am, could not find parking on the correct side of the street, so that meant that I would have to come out and move my car, which I felt was a waste because parking where I live is crazy at that time, so I went upstairs...did a little work from home and answered a few phone calls and it was off to move the car...then.
6. of course I could find any parking, so I decided to drive back to Manhattan, pick up my kids from school because they had a half of day, thengot them something to eat and dropped them off by my moms so that I could make it to the other job by 2pm, but guess what?
7. After dropping them off at my moms.. I had to drive back uptown, but there was no parking and I had about 45 minutes to get to work, so what did I do..Instead of being late, I drove the car back to my moms block, parked the car behind her building, called my husband and told that when he picks up the kids at 5pm that the car would be behind the building. then I jumped on the train and made it to work on time in the pouring rain!
8. Then, I worked from 2-7pm dealing with parents students and staff..so at about 6:45 I called my husband to see if they got home safe and he was still at work!!! I did not want to hear my mothers mouth, so guess what...I called a cab to go back downtown to get my kids because I was closer and my husband was further up in the 170's and I was just a 5 minute cab ride away, then I called a cab and they did not have anyone to pick me up because it was pouring ran, so what did I do..
9. I walked 16 blocks!! to my car that parked by my mothers house, IN THE POURING RAIN WITH A LITTLE UMBRELLA...as I was walking..
10. My brother called me to tell me he was sick from some food he ate and need me to take my neice to my sisters house, so although hate driving in the rain...I picked up my kids and my neice and drove them across town, then after that I was going to drive back home to the bronx from the east side, but since it was raining hard and my husband wanted tme to pick him up..I drove back across town to drive uptown to pick him up and then we drove home...i was soooo tired and frustrated, not at the things I had to do, but just how my day went. and that my friends was the day that could not end. I pray that my days be better

WELL....

well....well...

Happy New Year, Black History Year and Valentines Day. I missed you guys..I apologize for not being able to post, but I have been so busy with work that it is crazy. I have been getting to work at 8am and getting home at 8:30pm and I just don't have too much time..I check the kids homework, cook a meal or order out and then I fall out, but believe me it has been such a mess! I do plan to get back to blogging, becuase I have so much on my chest, so be on the look out for these topics;

1. Struggling with sexuality

2. No Time

3. Off My Chest!

4. The worst day that took too long to end

That's it for now, but the catch is you get to choose which one you want to hear about, just drop me a line and I will be sure to post by the end of this week